New day...new year...new beginnings.Or so they say. Well I meant to write this post yesterday - it being the last of 2010...but somehow never got around to writing it then. So here I am...on a momentous day --- 1/1/11....ruing on and writing about trains and train journeys....
Yesterday evening I got to travel by Mumbai local after a real long time. Once upon a time I was a regular. Suddenly all memories - good and bad came flashing back to me and I got into a nostalgic mood about what this decade meant to me...what it brought for me...and what it took away from me. Somehow I managed to use 'train' as a metephor for 'my journey of life' and hence everything I spill out in this post in someway related to trains and journeys.
Why write about journeys, you ask? We are all together in a journey. Friendships & relationships are made in journeys. We laugh & cry in journeys. We fight & unite in journeys. We love & lose in journeys. One can choose to be alone in a journey. One can watch trains go past on their journeys. All that is left in the end is the journey. The JOURNEY is EVERYTHING.
Ten years ago I was studying in 12th Standard. I remember I was struggling with French tuitions, event management classes, basic computer courses at NIIT, early morning Accounts classes at Bhatia and college lectures!!! Yes...I used to religiously attend college lectures..even on Saturdays...for fear that my college had 75% attendance record and I did not want to be a blacklisted student. So at this tender age of 17...I thought I had a lot on my platter and so much running about to do to prove to be an all-rounder. I was proud that I could multi-task well, tensed about how I will crack 12th boards, followed cute boys to the canteen, took long walks from college to home with friends and tried to figure out how to get rid of my teenage passion pimples. Life was so busy...and I thought it couldnt get tougher. Interestingly, my only train journey back then was from Vileparle to Andheri (3 minutes) at 7am in the morning and I used to stand on the footboard...feel the fresh morning air....and listen to bickering aunties in ladies compartment and smirk foolishly. Train journeys added colour to my daily dose of entertainment.
Now - 10 years, 3 job changes, MBA abroad and several criss-crossed relationships later - I am a new person. I have grown...I have matured (or so I think) and I have entered the unpleasant side of 20's. The experience that I have under my belt right now...both on personal and professional front - has made me calmer and confused at the same time. Train has moved far ahead from its starting point but destination is still further away. Maybe it is not even half way to its destination. Searching for new lands...gushing through free countryside...small towns and big cities....short halts and long waits....it has been a journey that I can NEVER forget!!!
So many times this trudging lil train has faced winding roads...which have been difficult to maneuvre. But then...having such wonderful loved ones as its engine....the navigation gets simpler. There have been times when just like the train...I have changed tracks....taken the road less travelled. Sometimes I have unravelled enchanting mysteries about myself and other times I have committed grave mistakes which I have paid heavy prices for. I have discovered something so ethereal and mystical about this journey and every such off-track experience has helped me in someway or another. Either an escapade has revealed a critical weakness of my personality/behaviour or has enabled me to add a new feather to my cap of strengths. I can remember equal number of times when devil horns have grown around me and I have come face to face with the villan within me. And then again...sometimes a wonderful luminous angelic halo surrounds my head and helps make me a better person. So life has been all about blacks and whites. It has been grey. Good and bad experiences have shaped up my life. Similarly sugar & spice have given me the right blend. So thats who I am. Or have come to become.
The train of my life has had to face several bridges and encounter crossroads and railway crossings. On the other side of the bridge lies the road ahead...but the bridge is built over a tumultous sea or a shuddering river. There is always this fear of encountering bizzare situations where a bridge breaks. It has happened before every exam or its subsequent result. Before each job interview, personal interview, test or examination. A fear that grips the insides of my intenstines and leaves me queasy and restless. But once I come to the bridge...I do make an attempt to crossover to discover the realm on the other side of the chasm. And with crossing every bridge or railway barricade...I have gained the confidence to move ahead in life. Bridges are an absolute essential to traverse the gap between where we lie now to the other side of the world where our future lies.
I guess what I am trying to say with the help of this post is that...while my train of life trudges along the path of discovery powered by the engine of love and togetherness and coupled with compartments of 'career', 'dreams' and 'aspirations'....several people hop on to it and hop off. Some are just fleeting visits and some leave everlasting impressions. Some come for a small season...while others stay on forever. The train stops at different stations....teeny weeny towns and big junctions. Each halt comes with its own fragrance and meaning. Sometimes the train is just raring to go after a long halt...and there have also been instances where leaving a station behind has left a permanent void in the heart. But the train moves on....rain or shine....it gets along with its journey to find a better world and a better future.
Like a famous Kishore Kumar song goes....' Gaadi bula rahi hai....seeti bajaa rahi hai....chalna hi zindagi hai...chalti hi jaa rahi hai....'
Happy 2011 everyone...may the year bring its best for all of us! :)
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