Ek Vivah Aisa Bhi...

Some couplets that come to mind about Marriage as mentioned by Kahlil Gibran in The Prophet --

'You were born together, and together you shall be for evermore.
You shall be together even in the silent memory of God.
...And let the winds of the heavens dance between you.
Love one another, but make not a bond of love:
Let it rather be a moving sea between the shore of your souls.
...Sing and dance together and be joyous, but let each one of you be alone,
...And stand together yet not too near together:
For the pillars of the temple stand apart,
And the oak tree and cypress grow not in each other's shadow.'

Well thats what is a wedding after all - a marriage!

Come November and December, India becomes the wedding hub of the world. Winter weddings are very much in vogue and the wedding season has pretty much begun here this year.Wedding industry is soon becoming very big and commercialised and no amount of credit crunch really seems to be affecting its magnitude or intensity this year.

Weddings in India are a lot of fun...well for almost all except for the main people involved!Its full of relatives and friends, a get-together of sorts, dancing, laughter and great FOOD.Its upto the bride and groom whether they really can enjoy all these festivities. Normally I have seen tensed grooms and flustered made up brides go through tonnes of rituals, fasts, pujas, anxious moments, camera lights and endless activities. They look so drained by the end of the day that all they want to really do is sleep...not even eat but then comes the whole round of bidaai and griha pravesh ceremonies and hundreds of 'PAAI LAAGU's' along with smiling for innumerable photographs till the facial muscles ache. Most times you are smiling and meeting people probably for the first and last time in the life...but then you are hosting the wedding - look presentable or die!

Aah well...thats maybe a very warped way of looking at weddings - im sure they are fun and maybe I will cross the bridge when I come to it. After all it is coming together of 2 individuals and getting each other introduced to the families while shedding inhibitions and celebrating precious moments. It is definitely the most special day of these 2 people's lives as they embark upon a journey together with so many happy times and blessings for their togetherness. Infact the idea of ritualistic Indian weddings in very appealing and a beautiful concept coz you are the centre of attention and everything is done by loved ones to make it your most memorable day!

Its even better when you are on the other side - i.e. the guest attending the wedding. Last weekend a Cardiff friend, Parag got married with much pomp and show in a little town of Ahmednagar - a couple of hours away from Pune.The best part of attending this wedding was a reunion with several mates from the B-School I passed out from more than 2 years ago.

It was awesome how I was meeting people after such a huge lull but still reconnecting with them as if I always was around them. I guess technology had a big role to play coz even though the physical distances separated good pals living in different corners of India, we were very much in sync and networked through the virtual world.So this was not the day when Chennai, Jaipur, Delhi, Mumbai, Pune & Bangalore came together. IT WAS THE DAY WHEN CARDIFF CAME DOWN TO AHMEDNAGAR. The same spirit, the same jokes, the same people - just a different location. Ofcourse it was heartening to know how so many of us were married or committed, how many had been successfully handling 'papa's business', some still studying further and a few like me were married to their work! :) We all had grown obviously in terms of maturity and seriousness about what life would have in store but that did not disuadde us from discussing the funny professors and courses we had back then, the crazy winters of Cardiff and general gossip about buddies or batchmates who could not make it for the wedding. While I was still digesting the idea of many of us married (girls and boys alike) - some as old as me or even younger, I was quite shocked to know how a couple of them were about to become daddies. No offence to anyone concerned but I had worked with these so-called uncles on projects and they definitely were like kids themselves then.So 2 years must have affected some massive transformation for them to move on to newer roles in life!Commendable & Brave(really no sarcasm indicated)!!

Apart from the numerous functions, umpteen number of outfit changes (like Bollywood actors) and running about to reach the venue - a part which took up most of our time was the MEALS. Ever been to a Marvari wedding? If not, then you should go once to experience atleast once what I am about to narrate. Imagine having 5-6 meals in a day with atleast 15-20 types of sweets in every meal, shoved down your mouth by relatives of the bride and groom alike as a way of expressing their gratitude for us being able to grace the occassion. Imagine all these mithais dripping in ghee, with tonnes of dryfruits and unimaginable amount of sugar!!!Thats like eating a year full of calories in a single day. To add to it, there was a special meal arranged in the afternoon by the bride's side called 'Svajan Kot' where the groom and his friends (us) sat across a table and were served (forced) mithais down our throats and no amount of pitiable faces, groans, anger or denial really was visible to any of them. For them the motto was 'Feed them.' Well anyways, each wedding and each custom has its special aspects and maybe it was an important aspect for them, so all respect to that!

However what was really endearing was how the groom's father looked after us as if we were his own kids. It was awesome how our stay was so well planned and coordinated, how transport was so well arranged, how all our needs and requirements were taken care of so smoothly and how the groom and his family made every effort to ensure we have a luxurious and memorable wedding. It was really a very touching gesture and something we all learnt from coz its easy to invite guests but its equally difficult to make them feel at home. And thats how we felt at Parag's wedding - at home. For a person who is getting married or his immediate family, when really there are several other aspects that need to be taken care of on their family front - to show this amount of dedication and importance to just a bunch of friends was really very commendable!

The chilly November night, the beautiful lawns, the spectacular fireworks and decor, the magnificient lights and flowers, the sparkling diamonds, the flashy outfits, the melodious music, celebrations & joy, gossipping with old friends, laughing over stupid matters,posing for innumerable photos, eating thousands of meals, a happy bride and groom - are all the memories that I took back from me last Sunday afternoon when I left Ahmednagar. Will I like to attend such a wedding again? Sure thing! I am game for it, ofcourse with a pinch of Pudin Hara!!! ;) :)